Week 5 Story: The Eternal Flame
Edit: This story has been transferred to my Portfolio. Click here to view the most up to date version.
In the Kingdom of Thallos, the streets were flooded with its residents and guests from all around. People of all ages crowded about, swathed in the finest of cloths and covered with jewels. The prince of the kingdom had recently come of age, and he had proposed a trial to determine who might be worthy of his marrying. The prince was very moral and kind. He knew many women might be deceitful so that they might share his power and wealth. He decided that his future wife needed to be put to the test before he chose her for his partner.
The kingdom was well known for something special. A great fire burned in a pit in the courtyard of the palace. But this flame was special, for it burned continuously. A strike of lightning had erupted the pit, and the inferno continued to burn there for years despite snow or rain. Many believed the gods themselves had sent it as a gift. The prince knew that any person who could extinguish the flames must be guided by the gods. So, he sent an open invitation to any woman who might try their hand at completing this task. Thousands gathered to watch and take part of the ceremony.
The prince kindly greeted the women and thanked them for coming. He seated himself behind the blaze and asked the first girl to step up to the eternal fire. She puffed out her chest and confidently strode toward the flame. She had a pail of water in each hand, but neither of them were able to douse the blaze. She stood there confused, and then angry. Two guards carried her away while she screamed about the trial being unfair. More girls brought larger quantities of water and milk. Others tried using stone and metal coverings to suffocate the flame. This carried on for days. The prince began to grow tired and hopeless that he might find his wife.
On the seventh day, the prince declared it would be the final day. After this, he thought, he might have to come up with an alternative trial. Perhaps he was wrong about the gods. Then, a startlingly beautiful young woman stepped to the front of the line. She wore a scarlet dress of silk, that, when she moved, looked like flames. Rubies dripped from her ears and throat. Her golden eyes glanced up at the prince before focusing on the fire.
Though the inferno reached higher than a foot above her head, she raised her arms as if to push it down. The flames began to shrink down lower and lower. She pressed her hands into the top of the blaze and did not wince. Moments later, her fingers touched the dying embers of the pit and the fire was extinguished. The normally raucous crowd was silent as she raised herself up from the ground. She dusted off her hands and raised her eyes back to the prince. They had a new glisten in them. Almost like her irises now housed the flames she had smothered.
The prince raced from his seat and kneeled before the mysterious woman. He took one of her hands in his and it was cool to the touch–somehow unmarred from the fire. He knew she must have been sent to him for an important purpose. She was very special, and would no doubt make an incredible wife for the prince and ruler to Thallos. He quietly proposed that she might marry him. For the first time since entering the courtyard, she smiled brilliantly. At the very moment she accepted his request, the pit erupted into a blaze even higher and stronger than before. Many from the crowd yelled in surprise, but the prince only stared at his new fiancée with amazement.
In the Kingdom of Thallos, the streets were flooded with its residents and guests from all around. People of all ages crowded about, swathed in the finest of cloths and covered with jewels. The prince of the kingdom had recently come of age, and he had proposed a trial to determine who might be worthy of his marrying. The prince was very moral and kind. He knew many women might be deceitful so that they might share his power and wealth. He decided that his future wife needed to be put to the test before he chose her for his partner.
The kingdom was well known for something special. A great fire burned in a pit in the courtyard of the palace. But this flame was special, for it burned continuously. A strike of lightning had erupted the pit, and the inferno continued to burn there for years despite snow or rain. Many believed the gods themselves had sent it as a gift. The prince knew that any person who could extinguish the flames must be guided by the gods. So, he sent an open invitation to any woman who might try their hand at completing this task. Thousands gathered to watch and take part of the ceremony.
The prince kindly greeted the women and thanked them for coming. He seated himself behind the blaze and asked the first girl to step up to the eternal fire. She puffed out her chest and confidently strode toward the flame. She had a pail of water in each hand, but neither of them were able to douse the blaze. She stood there confused, and then angry. Two guards carried her away while she screamed about the trial being unfair. More girls brought larger quantities of water and milk. Others tried using stone and metal coverings to suffocate the flame. This carried on for days. The prince began to grow tired and hopeless that he might find his wife.
On the seventh day, the prince declared it would be the final day. After this, he thought, he might have to come up with an alternative trial. Perhaps he was wrong about the gods. Then, a startlingly beautiful young woman stepped to the front of the line. She wore a scarlet dress of silk, that, when she moved, looked like flames. Rubies dripped from her ears and throat. Her golden eyes glanced up at the prince before focusing on the fire.
Though the inferno reached higher than a foot above her head, she raised her arms as if to push it down. The flames began to shrink down lower and lower. She pressed her hands into the top of the blaze and did not wince. Moments later, her fingers touched the dying embers of the pit and the fire was extinguished. The normally raucous crowd was silent as she raised herself up from the ground. She dusted off her hands and raised her eyes back to the prince. They had a new glisten in them. Almost like her irises now housed the flames she had smothered.
Author’s Note: In the original version of this story, Rama stumbled upon a beautiful princess named Sita. Sita’s father tells Rama that if he can break this sacred bow, he can marry Sita. No one before him has been able to even lift the bow, but Rama is able to pass the trial. This means Rama must be a little bit divine or at least blessed by some deity. Therefore, he is fit for marrying and they live happily ever after (kind of). I wanted to do a bit of a gender swap so that my prince is the one searching for a wife. I noticed that the number 7, fire, and the testing of women’s morality (especially with fire) were common themes in the Ramayana, so I tried to find ways to include those. I didn’t include any backstory on the fire girl, but if I choose this to be in my Portfolio later, I’ll definitely work on that.
Image Information:
Flames, Source: Wikimedia Commons
Smoke, Source: Pexels
Bibliography:
"Sita" from Nine Ideal Indian Women by Sunity Devee
Ramayana PDE
Bibliography:
"Sita" from Nine Ideal Indian Women by Sunity Devee
Ramayana PDE
Great story Casey! I really enjoyed the natural feel that you created with your description as well as pictures. I think by describing the setting you do and letting people know the importance of the fire is crucial in developing your story because it also leads the reader into wonder what is going to happen. I'm excited to read more of your stories in the future.
ReplyDeleteAwesome story Casey! I like how you just jump straight into a description of a scene and it does a really good job of pulling the reader into the story. I also really like the pictures you include in the story and they help with visualizing while reading the story. I like how you combined aspects of many different stories to make a new story all your own.
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